An Experimental Knowledge of the Precious Truths of God

One of my favorite names in Christian history is Octavius Winslow. Octavius Winslow was a Reformed Baptist contemporary of Charles Spurgeon. The following is a brief biography of this 19^th Century pastor.

Octavius Winslow, 1808-1878, descended from Edward Winslow, a Pilgrim leader who braved the Atlantic to come to the New World on the Mayflower in 1620. The father of Octavius, Thomas Winslow, an army captain stationed in London, died when he was seven years old. Shortly after that, his God-fearing mother took her family of ten children to New York. All of the children became Christians, and three sons became evangelical ministers. Octavius later wrote a book about his family’s experiences from his mother’s perspective, titled “Life in Jesus”.

Winslow was ordained as a pastor in 1833 in New York. He later moved to England where he became one of the most valued nonconformist ministers of the nineteenth century, largely due to the earnestness of his preaching and the excellence of his prolific writings. He held pastorates in Leamington Spa, Bath, and Brighton. He was also a popular speaker for special occasions, such as the opening of C. H. Spurgeon’s Metropolitan Tabernacle in 1861. After a short illness, he died on March 5, 1878, and was buried in Abbey Cemetery, Bath.

Winslow wrote more than forty books, in which he promoted an experimental knowledge of the precious truths of God.

That last comment I love – ‘an experimental knowledge of the precious truths of God’. What does that mean? It means that the truths of God’s word, particularly about the saving work of Jesus Christ, are so soaked into our lives that our thoughts come alive with the implications of grace. This week let me share an example of experimental knowledge with you from the writings of Octavius Winslow, courtesy of the brothers at First Importance.

“So completely was Jesus bent upon saving sinners by the sacrifice of Himself, He created the tree upon which He was to die, and nurtured from infancy the men who were to nail Him to the accursed wood.”

Octavius Winslow, “The Foot of the Cross”)

Such is the love of the Savior for us. Such is the stuff of experiential knowledge of the precious truths of God.

Little League – Big Opportunity

It is spring – and that means Little League to many families. Whether it is baseball, softball, soccer, or any other game; the spring sports season can occupy huge chunks of time in our family schedules. How can we make the best use of the time the family invests to let our little Jimmy Rollins run the basis or our petit Mia Hamm cover midfield? I’ve got a son who does fall soccer and spring baseball and here are some things I’ve learned.

• For many folks, little league sports functions as an equivalent of a church. They are sincerely committed and see it as a positive part of raising their children. But I have a church and sports is just a game. So I shouldn’t be surprised at how much commitment on the part of parents and families is assumed by the leagues. I need to bring wisdom to how much time and money commitment my family makes, and help my little leaguer have his or her expectations of involvement set by the family and not by the team.

• I’ve talked with my son about his role in being a witness for Christ on the team. All of my instruction to him about obeying the coach, playing hard but fair, guarding his tongue and ears, being an encourager, watching his attitude, etc are directed first at his opportunity to be a witness. While there are leadership and sportsmanship values to be learned, they are secondary to remembering who he represents on the field.

• Having established a wise balance of commitment and helped my son prepare for his role, I want to invest myself as fully as possible. This is the greatest evangelism opportunity I may get all year. I try to be at every practice I can, and help out any way I can. If it means dragging the field, umpiring, lining the base paths, coaching first base – I make it my goal to serve my child’s coach in any way he can use me. This gives me an opportunity for servant outreach and, in addition, let’s me be part of my son’s experience beyond just rooting him on.

• As a family we have an evangelistic focus to little league. My son has his role – to be an example and befriend his teammates, particularly the ‘uncool’ ones. I have the job of getting to know the dads and developing conversational relationships that can lead to witnessing opportunities. When Jill can be there she is engaging moms. It all works together. As my son handles himself in a godly way on the team, dads notice, which opens up doors for me. And as I engage dads, moms take notice and that opens up doors for Jill.

• Often our chicken barbecue outreach invitations come out right before the end of the season. So we have something of a goal to be in position to invite folks to that outreach through building relationships.

Last Spring we were away for several weeks during the season, which made it more difficult to develop relationships. But two years ago I had the chance to share at various times with the dads on the team and was able to spend an hour and a half sharing the Gospel with one dad when we took some of the boys to a minor league game.

If you have kids in league sports this spring, pray that God will give you a strategy for Gospel impact with the time you invest.

TAKE FIVE

Gentlemen,

The men’s blog is here! Thanks for checking us out. We got some great name ideas – enough to launch a dozen blogs. I’ve included some of more creative entries below. The name we’ve chosen is, “TAKE FIVE”. While it isn’t the specific name submitted by any particular guy, it combines the themes that were most prominent in the entries we received.

Why TAKE FIVE?. Here are Five Reasons:

1. Its short and easy to remember. We all know TAKE FIVE. Think hot practice field or gym when you’re gassed and need a break. Think intense meeting when tempers are getting short. Think project deadline when your brain is starting to tilt. TAKE FIVE is a small break that can make a huge difference.

2. It’s masculine without being macho.

3. It’s a classic Dave Brubeck/Paul Desmond jazz tune. Check it out

4. It’s a reminder to our writers to keep it succinct – we’re not writing Moby Dick here. Our motto: if you can’t say it in five hundred words, its probably boring.

5. Most importantly, it gets at what this blog is about. Our goal would be to have every husband and father in the church ‘take five’ on Thursdays and check out the blog. Our desire is to take five minutes of your busy day to give you something you can use – for your life, for your relationships, for your soul. Our commitment is to get you on and off in five minutes – and make that five minutes worth your investment.

Why a blog? Aren’t there more blogs out there than anybody could ever read? I think you’ll really find this blog unique. It is for YOU, the men of CFC. We’re not out to pontificate – we’re here to serve. The Family Life Blog exists to ‘encourage, inspire, and instruct’ – to help you do what God’s called you to do. At times we’ll connect you to stuff in blogworld that can help you. But if nobody ever reads this but the men of this church – it’ll be a success.

Here are FIVE things we hope you guys will do:

1. Every guy will check in on the blog each Thursday.
2. Talk and fellowship over what you read – with each other and with your families.
3. Respond to the blog with your feedback, thoughts, etc.
4. Share helpful stuff you find here with other men you know
5. Take an extra five and scroll through the other posts for the week.

The Name Contest

We received about 75 name suggestions for the blog – great job guys. Here are some of the more creative ones:

· Thursdays at Blog Shack

· The Warrior Zone

· Words for Lumberjacks

What about the prize? Since TAKE FIVE didn’t come in from any single individual, we’re giving the name prize to a guy who chose a shock and awe approach. He submitted thirty-six possibilities! So Gary Eberly gets the prize – he had some quality, but was all about quantity!

Put us on your desktop, in your favorites, drop in when you check the weather, the news, the scores. TAKE FIVE is here for you.

March Madness – Family Life Style

Two weeks ago Mark made a request on this blog for prayer for our Family Life Planning retreat. Thank you for praying for us. Throughout our time together over two days it was evident that the Spirit of God was imparting both vision and strategy for the families of Covenant Fellowship Church over the next year. And we also had a great time building the Family Life Team in the process.

But don’t get the impression that the planning process is a simple, orderly affair. Throw five committed, creative guys in a room with coffee, Nerf basketball and a white board and, well, you get something like what you see below.

Trust us; this will all make sense in the months ahead.

Breathe Grace

Ladies – don’t forget the Women’s Meeting this Saturday, March 29 at 9:00 a.m.

It happened before a prayer meeting – of all places. As I brought a concern that was on my heart, the discussion turned and the next thing I knew, I had unintentionally led the group into a gossip and complaining session. By the grace of God, we were able to stop ourselves and turn to prayer. Why are women so susceptible to gossip and complaining? How can we gain victory in this area?

That particular instance was a sobering one for me… how easy it is to allow ourselves to drift into unwholesome talk. It is usually not intentional. Often times it tends to be subtle. But at other times we know exactly what we are doing and with whom we can get away with complaining and gossiping.

The bottom line is that the Bible says in Ephesians 4:29 “Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen.” This is a command from Scripture, that gets my attention. It helps me see that if I gossiping and complaining I am not concerned about the needs of others. And if I am concerned about building others up I won’t be seeking opportunities to vocalize my complaints or participate in gossip.

After the above incident, I began to cry out to God to help me in this area. I looked up scripture verses on gossip and even found an excellent message by Ken Sande called Breathe Grace. In it he said, “Our words are life giving words – either killing – or life giving. We should think of breathing grace. As God breathes life into us, we can breathe life into others with encouragement, hope, and loving correction.” With God’s help I am making a conscious decision to guard my heart and mouth from words that are not edifying or God glorifying. Instead, I want every word I speak to be a breath of grace.

I know that this is going to be a difficult battle to fight, but God promises blessings from obedience. And, for accountability sake, I have asked my husband and friends to make me aware of any words that I speak that would not be pleasing in His sight. I don’t want to make friends with this sin but to labor, struggling with all his energy with so powerfully works in me to overcome it (Col. 1:29).

As the women of Covenant Fellowship Church, may we be known as women who breathe grace to others through our words.

May the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be pleasing in your sight, O LORD, my Rock and my Redeemer (Psalms 19:14).

Emotions and What to Do With Them

Today’s Wisdom for the Week comes to us from our friends Tim Lane and Paul Tripp from their excellent book on practical ministry, “How People Change”. One thing I appreciate about Paul and Tim is the way they can put into words what often swirls around my head and my heart.

Did you ever wonder why the way you respond to challenging situations can sometimes seem so inconsistent with what you believe? Check this out.

“The emotions we feel as we first go through difficult experiences are not static. They morph into subtle but extremely influential conclusions about God, ourselves, others, and life. Yet these major changes in what we believe have not been well thought out. We have not put ourselves through a careful theological re-evaluation. Rather, our unresolved feelings become our interpretations of life. Emotions morph into conclusions, and we are end up not believing the things we say we believe.” (p. 110)

Tripp and Lane are getting at how everything we experience has theological implications. When emotions interpret my experience apart from truth, I will not respond in the way God intends. God’s truth does not deny feelings, it provides the proper channel for them to benefit me and honor God.

Here is something to practice this week. When you feel, stop and think. As you think, let truth make sense of your feelings.

Adopted Into The Family

This past Sunday Jim shared a story of adoption in his message from Galatians 4. It was a moving story that simultaneously shows us the privilege and power of parental love, and also the extent to which God has loved us in making us his own children through adoption.

Russell Moore, Dean of the School of Theology at the Southern Baptist Theological Seminary in Louisville, KY tells this story of his adoption of two boys from a from a Russian orphanage.

When Maria and I first walked into the orphanage, where we were led to the boys the Russian court had picked out for us to adopt, we almost vomited in reaction to the stench and squalor of the place. The boys were in cribs in the dark, lying in their own waste. Leaving them at the end of each day was painful, but leaving them the final day before going home to wait for the paperwork to go through, was the hardest thing either of us had ever done. Walking out of the room to prepare for the plane ride home, Maria and I could hear Maxim crying out for us and falling down in his crib, convulsing in tears. Maria shook with tears and I turned around to walk back in their room just for a minute. I placed my hand on both their heads and said, knowing they couldn’t understand a word of my English, “I will not leave you as orphans, I will come to you.” I don’t think I consciously intended to cite Jesus’ words to his disciples in John 14:18. It just seemed like the only thing worth saying at the time.

When Maria and I at long last received the call that the legal process was over, and we returned to Russia to pick up our new sons, we found that their transition from orphanage to family was more difficult than we had supposed. We dressed the boys in outfits our parents had bought them. My mother-in-law gathered some wildflowers growing between cracks in the pavement outside the orphanage. We nodded our thanks to the orphanage workers and walked out into the sunlight - to the terror of the two boys. They’d never seen the sun and they’d never felt the wind. They’d never heard the sound of a car door slamming or had the sensation of being carried along at a hundred miles an hour down a Russian road. I noticed that they were shaking and reaching back to the orphanage in the distance. I whispered to Sergei, now Timothy, “that place is a pit, if only you knew what’s waiting for you. A home. With a mommy and daddy who love you. Grandparents. And great-grandparents. And cousins and playmates. And McDonald’s Happy Meals.” But all they knew was the orphanage. It was squalid but they had no other reference point, and it was home.

We knew the boys had acclimated to our home, that they trusted us, when they stopped hiding food in their high chairs. They knew there would be another meal coming, and they would not have to fight for the scraps. This was the new normal. They are now thoroughly Americanized, perhaps too much so, able to recognize the sound of a microwave ding from 40 yards away. I still remember, though, those little hands reaching for the orphanage. And I see myself there.

Change in the Blog

Beginning on March 27, we are changing our Thursday “Practical Matters” to a post designed by men for men.

Here’s where you can help us, we need a name for the Thursday posts. If your suggestion is selected there’s a $50 Home Depot gift certificate coming your way. To submit a name, send an email to familylifecfc@gmail.com or use the link on the right side-bar of the blog.

The new Thursday posting will feature both pastors and other guys in the church who have good stuff to say about the things that matter to men. You’ll get practical stuff, challenging stuff, funny stuff - stuff that will help you keep your edge in a soul-dulling world. So submit your name suggestions and check back with us on March 27 for the kick-off of the new Thursday posting

The Miracle of Marriage – Up Close and Personal

Do you consider marriage a miracle? Maybe you’re like me and you realize that, yes indeed, it took a miracle for me to get married. It took a divine intervention of blindness and mercy for the girl I loved to say “yes” to my marriage proposal nearly a quarter century ago. I’m glad she never got over it.

If you are married do you see yourself as part of an ongoing miracle of God? Do you see that, if you are a Christian man or woman, to be in marriage as God has designed it is to be dependent on the divine working of God in your life, because the purpose of your marriage is to uniquely represent his redemptive love and plan through your covenant relationship?

In Ephesians 5, the Apostle Paul marvels at this mystery, and we should as well. When I had the privilege of pastoring single adults, I had the amazing opportunity to witness up close the unfolding of miraculous activity of the Lord in bringing single folks together in marriage. I’ve had had the honor of officiating at ninety or so weddings, each one a unique expression of God’s divine organization. Sometimes it has been humorous, such as the two singles who served in ministry together and swore they had no attraction, only to be married less than two years after these bold pronouncements. Or of the single lady who patiently waited during courtship for her hoped-for husband to be to finish school and get a job so he could propose. After rehearsing her answer to a proposal over and over in her mind, when the moment finally came, the only response she was able to muster was to throw up!

Along with the humorous stories, there have been wonderful stories of God’s faithfulness – of single men stepping up not only to the call of marriage, but to the call of parenting as they made single moms into wives. Christian families have been joined together for a new heritage through the wedding of their children. Racial and cultural differences have brought into wonderful harmony through the covenant of marriage.

Are these miracles? Is it a miracle of faith that two sinners can embrace the high calling of husband and wife, knowing that with those roles comes blessing and witness to the gospel, even though they are constantly aware of how much they need to grow? Is it a miracle of hope for someone to stand in front of friends and family and promise lifetime commitment to marriage with no guarantee of what the future holds? Is it a miracle of love for two people who have known only singleness to blend their lives together at the deepest levels – two becoming one?

Faith, hope, love. Look around you. There are miracles happening every day. In the amazing adventure of Christian marriage!

Hospitality – Cold Tongue….or Warm Truth?

Amy, the youngest of the sisters in Louise May Alcott’s, Little Women, asked her mother if she could invite several friends from her drawing class over for lunch. Mrs. March approved, saying “Cake, sandwiches, fruit and coffee will be all that is necessary, I suppose?” Amy quickly responded, “Oh dear, no! We must have cold tongue and chicken, French chocolate, and ice-cream besides! The girls are used to such things, and I want my lunch to be proper and elegant…” Mrs. March tried to persuade her daughter toward a more “simpler plan” that would be “pleasanter” for all, but Amy would not budge. So Mrs. March conceded, remembering how “experience can be an excellent teacher.” And the rest of the story is well…sad and humorous at the same time. (That chapter is entitled “Artistic Attempts” if you’re curious how it turned out)

As I read that passage to my daughter, Rosie, I couldn’t help but think that I am more like Amy March than I would like to admit. And have I EVER tasted of those painful teaching experiences where my focus on the food and its presentation prevailed over a desire to connect with women who are dear to me. Such times have threatened to tarnish my view on hospitality, but God has a better way—one that is not steeped in ‘proper and elegant’, but is rooted in love and commends the Gospel. Theologian Alexander Strauch calls hospitality a “concrete expression of Christian love,” which can sweetly strengthen the family of believers, and can also be an ideal context for evangelism. And we as women get to carry it out!

Does your home feel like a retreat sometimes? Or like a box you live in and can’t seem to get out of? God has given us the gifts and opportunity to create a warm environment in our homes which draws people together and toward God. Although we have a church building and meet together regularly, there remains a need and desire for closeness and fellowship which can only come about as we share and bring people into our lives and homes. When people come into our homes they get to know us in a special way. Opening the doors of our home is often the way we can open the doors to real and powerful ministry. Hospitality really is a wonderful call—a part of our larger call to biblical femininity. And we are not left to do this by ourselves--the Holy Spirit empowers us to embrace and carry out the biblical model of hospitality.

What does that biblical model look like? Come and listen as we will be discussing this topic at the Women’s meeting on March 29^{th at} 9:00 am. Don’t miss this opportunity to hear about what God can do among and through us and our homes for the sake of the Gospel. There will be fellowship, laughter, a short teaching and a panel (with helpful ideas) and good food! And it won’t be “cold tongue” whatever that is, I promise J!

Christ, the Conqueror of Satan

It is the Week of Easter, so Wisdom for the Week brings a great thought from Charles Spurgeon on the victory of Christ in Good Friday and Easter Sunday. (compliments of http://firstimportance.org)

He is risen! He is risen indeed!

Christ, the Conqueror of Satan

“Though Satan is not dead, yet Christ has so far broken his head that he has missed his mark altogether.

He intended to make the human race the captives of his power, but they are redeemed from his iron yoke. God has delivered many of them, and the day shall come when he will cleanse the whole earth from the serpent’s slimy trail, so that the entire world shall be full of the praises of God.

He thought that this world would be the arena of his victory over God and good, instead of which it is already the grandest theatre of divine wisdom, love, grace, and power. Even heaven itself is not so resplendent with mercy as the earth is, for here it is the Saviour poured out his blood, which cannot be said even of the courts of paradise above.

Moreover he thought, no doubt, that when he had led our race astray and brought death upon them, he had effectually marred the Lord’s work. He rejoiced that they would all pass under the cold seal of death, and that their bodies would rot in the sepulchre. Had he not spoiled the handiwork of his great Lord? God may make man as a curious creature with intertwisted veins and blood and nerves, and sinews and muscles, and he may put into his nostrils the breath of life; but, ‘Ah,’ saith Satan, ‘I have infused a poison into him which will make him return to the dust from which he was taken.’

But now, behold, our Champion whose heel was bruised has risen from the dead, and given us a pledge that all his followers shall rise from the dead also. Thus is Satan foiled, for death shall not retain a bone, nor a piece of a bone, of one of those who belonged to the woman’s seed. At the trump of the archangel from the earth and from the sea they shall arise, and this shall be their shout, ‘O death, where is thy sting? O grave, where is thy victory?’ Satan, knowing this, feels already that by the resurrection his head is broken. Glory be to the Christ of God for this!”

- Charles Spurgeon, Christ’s Glorious Achievements

Closer to a Quiver Full

I read an article on the Washington Post web site reporting that the fertility rate in the United States has reached a thirty-five year high, climbing to 2.1 babies per household. At this pace, the article announced, the United States has solidified a position alongside other industrialized nations in reaching a sustainable population rate. To put the number in perspective, during the height of the baby boom the number of births per family reached 3.8 and during the mid seventies it reached a low of 1.7 births per household. Strangely enough the article did not mention the affects of legalized abortion on the numbers. But it did credit our nation’s “religiosity” as one of the factors promoting the fertility boom.

The Bible tells us children are a gift and a reward from God, (Psalm 127:3). Because God is pro children, Christians should be pro-children as well, whether that is in the valuing and protecting them prior to birth or nurturing and caring for them in an increasingly anti-children culture.

But how does a person know how many children to have? Is hitting the average at 2.1 a good place to start, or stop? Numbers might work well for national averages but every married couple should seek the Lord to direct the size of their family. Start with Psalm 127:3 and move on from there.

Here’s a little evaluation exercise to consider. How many birthday gifts do you want on your birthday, or presents at Christmas? If you are like me, you want more than a few. Children should be received as gifts in the same way, as gifts to be celebrated throughout life. The goal, the psalmist says, a quiver full, (Ps 127:5). We don’t carry children in quivers but we do carry them in minivans. Maybe that’s a great translation of the text: Blessed is the man whose minivan is full of them.

When we consider that each child is a gift from God, not a right to have, and that there are many families who would long for more children but simply haven’t been able to conceive, we should think about this question as far more than a lifestyle choice. Two point one is an acceptable national average, but our posture should be, ‘Lord, whatever number of children you would have for me, I will receive them as a gift’.

Check out the full article.

Construction…Destruction…Sanctification

When Jill and I purchased our three bedroom rancher we agreed the first project would be the kitchen. The cabinets were mismatched (some were even homemade) the gold Formica countertop was delaminating (i.e. peeling) and the floor (a vinyl, sheet goods product) was coming up at the seams. Decided. Done. Kitchen first!

That was seven years ago.

Needless to say, this project has intimidated me. In the last seven years I’ve redone both bathrooms, painted the living and family rooms, done extensive landscaping, even rebuilt the porch to avoid facing the kitchen monster. The amount of work isn’t the issue, it’s how completely intertwined a kitchen has to be. Cabinets, countertop, flooring – they all have to work together as well as the rest of the house. Oh, and they’re all pricey and must be custom ordered. You make a mistake and you’ll pay through the nose or live with it until your last daughter is married.

Well, the project has begun. Here’s what I’ve learned so far.

· Whenever you have an estimate for how long a project will take – double it! It doesn’t matter if it’s coming from a contractor or it’s a Do-it-yourself project. It will take longer than you and everyone else thinks.

· Communicate. Talk things out with your spouse. Bounce ideas around. Talk about timing. Talk about what the finished product will look like. Talk about where you’ll put all your stuff while the project is underway. Talk about how you’ll eat day to day! Then talk to the contractor. Be specific. Write things down. Ask them to write things down. Keep talking.

· Remain flexible. Things are going to happen you won’t have anticipated. Even if you should have anticipated them, be gracious to one another and remember Who is sovereign (and good!).

· Plan to be tempted. Read 1 Corinthians 10:12-14. Read it again. Don’t you just love those three words right in the middle…? ‘God is faithful’? I need to hear that over and over.

One good thing about home renovation. You start out changing your house; your house ends up changing you.

Family Life Pastors Retreat

Each year we, as your Family Life Pastors, pull away on a planning retreat for a couple of days to pray, seek God and try to determine what we can do over the next one to two years to better serve the families of Covenant Fellowship Church. This is a wonderful privilege for us, for our time together always begins by thanking God for you and praying that your families would be strengthened in an on-going way by the amazing grace of God. In other words, this isn’t just a strategic planning retreat, but a strategic planning retreat that is very personal, for we carry each of you on our hearts. Knowing that God has given us the wonderful responsibility to care for your souls; would you please pray for us as we take the next two days to pray and plan? Our retreat begins today and runs through tomorrow. Here are some specific ways you can pray:

· That God would give us wisdom, discernment, direction, creativity, and fresh ideas on how we can better care for the families of Covenant Fellowship Church.

· That God would pour out his Spirit upon us, for our desire and eager anticipation is that our time would not just be working through an agenda, but a time that is led by the Holy Spirit.

· That God would give us creative ideas on how to continue to build a culture in the church that supports and strengthens the family.

· That God would give us clarity as to what we are to teach on in the next twelve to eighteen months that will better support what the leaders of our homes (dad’s and single parents) are endeavoring to do in the spiritual guidance of their families.

Knowing that you care for us and for the families of the church, we wanted to thank you ahead of time for being faithful to pray for us. There isn’t a day that goes by where we don’t consider the privilege God has given us to serve you. And, oh, what a joy that is!!

This is the day…

If you are like me, you always have a mental list of things that you are looking forward to—the weekend, a special time out with your husband, your next family vacation, a shopping trip to spend birthday money, bedtime (zzz!J). Looking ahead can be fun; it can inspire a sense of anticipation and excitement that helps lighten the tougher times we experience.

I was recently reminded of another kind of “looking ahead” that can subtly seep into the cracks and corners of my life and rob me of joy and contentment. Does this sound familiar?

“Things will be better when…” “Everything will be OK when…” (Fill in the blank!).

It is the kind of waiting that says, “I will have peace and contentment when this particular thing in my life changes.” I have done this in so many ways. When my mother was living with us in her final years, I filled in the blank with ‘things will be better when…’ kinds of thoughts. But there are subtler ways this kind of thinking can creep into my everyday living. What about “…when my husband changes in this area,” or, “…when this particular child learns to obey.” We all have something we can put in that blank. But to live this way is to somehow believe that God’s real purposes for my life will begin at some future point that I must define for him.

Psalm 100:8 says, “This is the day the Lord has made, let us rejoice and be glad in it.” The psalmist roots his contentment and joy in the fact that God is sovereign over his days—all of them—not just the ones in the future, but over THIS day. And this is a battle that is won or lost by where I chose to focus my attention. Do I dwell on everything that seems wrong with my life and then long for the day when my circumstances will change, OR do I fix my eyes the One who made all of my days and is able to give me grace for this day? In other words, I must anchor my hope for this day in God and not my circumstances. His Word is filled with promises that have helped me do this; here are just a few: Ephesians 2:10, 2 Cor 4:17, Ps 46:1, Ps 139:3 & 16, They help me walk in assurance that the difficulties of this day are not interruptions in God’s gracious plan for my life, but a part of his equipping me to rejoice in his presence and activity in my life every day. If we walk this way on this day, nothing can rob us of our joy and contentment in Him!

The Bridge of Grace

This quote comes from the brothers at firstimportance.org

The doctrine of the ‘perseverance of the saints’ is a very important and precious truth of God’s word. That those who truly belong to God will stay with God through eternity is a strong refuge against not only much error that places us at the center of our salvation, but it is a tower against all doubt that comes when our enemy exploits our failures and weaknesses of faith.

Charles Spurgeon gives us a beautiful word picture of the security of our salvation in grace. It is a fitting reminder of the basis for our confidence during our series in Galatians.

“The bridge of grace will bear your weight, brother. Thousands of big sinners have gone across that bridge, yea, tens of thousands have gone over it. I can hear their trampings now as they traverse the great arches of the bridge of salvation. They come by the thousands, by their myriads, e’er since that day when Christ first entered His glory.

They come and yet never a stone has sprung in that mighty bridge. Some have been the chief of sinners and some have come at the very last of their days but the arch has never yielded beneath their weight. I will go with them, trusting to the same support. It will bear me over as it has for them.”

The bridge of grace was built for you and me. Sola Gratia, indeed!

Discerning the Media

In the recent “News from the Christian Counseling & Educational Foundation”, Michele Howe of New Growth Press speaks with CCEF Faculty Member and marriage and family counselor Winston Smith about practical ways that parents can equip their family to think accurately in response to media's powerful messages. Here are some helpful insights

On helping our children discern media:

"The foundation for helping our youngsters develop their media antenna is to hone their understanding of the human heart. The Bible says we're all self-deceived. As people live out their belief systems in front of others, our kids need to understand that they're being exposed to someone's worldview, which is frequently inaccurate or skewed when lined up against the Bible."

On talking to our children about sex:

"The world presents sex as the hidden animal side of people and as a secret sin. The Bible teaches just the opposite. Sex between a married man and woman is specially designed to communicate love between them. But when sex is used outside God's parameters, we communicate something hurtful. Parents have the responsibility to give their kids a positive vision of sexuality."

On rules and wisdom:

"Moms and dads must ask themselves what their parenting goals are. As a father, my goal is to grow my kids into God-honoring persons of faith. I realize that as they move into adulthood, they cannot simply be rule followers any longer. Rather, they need to be wise decision makers. Parents have to understand their own transition from the rule enforcer to the wise counselor as their children get older. Our roles shift. Of course, how quickly this occurs depends on what each child can handle."

Smith offers helpful perspective on other issues as well, even on body piercings and tattoos, where he encourages parents not to react to those thoughts but to engage their teens help direct the issues to the heart. As pastors, we would see the point in what he says here, but we would add that there is a difference between buying a tee shirt that can be tossed or used as a rag in the future, and doing something permanent or defacing to your body, which belongs to God.

To read the complete article follow this link to “Make It Real: Media and the Home Front”

The Right Paint

Here’s a practical matter: What kind of paint should I use when I paint my house?

When painting a room there is more to think about besides color. You also need to consider what finish paint to apply. Standard latex comes in four finishes - flat, eggshell, Satin, and semi-gloss. Some paints also come in full gloss but their application is limited in the average home. Generally the duller (flatter) the finish the easier it is to paint but the harder to clean off once its painted.

Flat – Flat paint hides imperfections but attracts dirt like a magnet. Brush up against it with a black-soled sneaker and you’ve got a black line that is really hard to wash out. Flat works great on ceilings, where your kids don’t rub their hands, and hides the poorly spackled drywall seams. Flat is forgiving to apply and will not leave streaking if you don’t evenly apply the paint. And, if you save your paint, little touch ups are invisible from the original paint job.

Eggshell – If your walls are generally in good shape (no nail pops, patching or bad drywall seams) use eggshell over flat as it cleans up better and won’t grab dirt like flat paint. Eggshell is easy to apply and won’t show streaking easily. It is a good all around wall paint.

Satin – Satin has a bit more gloss than eggshell and a bit less than semi-gloss. Satin is a good choice for locations you want to hold up to heavy soil but that you don’t like too much shine. Possible application includes doors or trims work. If you use Satin on a large flat area like a ceiling or wall you are going to need to keep your paint coverage even and continue the painting while the paint is wet. If you stop your paint job, allowing a section to dry before you continue, you may get streaks with some colors.

Semi-gloss – This is the easiest paint to wash but the hardest to apply to large flat surfaces without streaking. Like Satin, keep the paint wet as you advance across the wall. This paint is ideal for trim, radiators and other decorative elements. This is a great choice for heavily traveled corridors in homes with lots of children - and window sills that catch a lot of dust and dirt. If you have a lot of kids, fix the nail pops and bad seams in those high traffic areas, then use semi-gloss. Hand prints come off with a standard cleaner. If you do get a stain that won’t come off, you might just need to do the whole wall again as semi-gloss typically shows if you only repaint over a smaller area.

Marriage: The Glorious Marathon

Rob Flood sends this along from the PC:

LiveScience has just released and article called, “Marriage: It’s Only Going to Get Worse.” And, if that uplifting title failed to encourage you, perhaps the opening pair of sentences will help. “If your spouse already bugs you now, the future is bleak. New research suggests couples view one another as even more irritating and demanding the longer they are together.”

Let’s admit it: they are probably correct. Most couples probably do feel their spouses grow more irritating and demanding. What do we do now?

We admit that this cannot be God’s intention for us. And, we press deeper into what’s going on here. Consider this:

When we are irritated, we assume that if the people and circumstances around us changed, we’d be fine. But what if the change lies not in our circumstances or in our spouse, but within us? This story might help. Shortly after their wedding in 1953, John realized that his new wife Joanne had a little habit of leaving tissues around the house. He chose to overlook it.

Fifteen years passed and John had overlooked it long enough. This became a source of irritation for John and tension developed in their marriage. Twenty-five years later, John and Joanne have grown weary of bickering over this little habit. There is distance between them and a current of resentment simmers under the surface, until Joanne is called home.

One day, when trying to fish a pen from between the sofa cushions, John grabs instead a crumpled tissue. Memories of love fill his heart…and eyes.

Nothing about the tissues changed at all. So, what could possibly account for the change of response from annoyance and irritation to love and joy? A change in John, of course. What the tissues meant to John changed. At first, they were an eccentricity of his lovely wife. They gradually became a sign showing Joanne’s lack of consideration. They ended up being a treasured memorial.

How can we accomplish this change in perspective while our spouse is still with us…while it can have an effect on our marriages now?

1. Recognize that your spouse is a gift. If we treasure the person of our spouse more than the comfort they provide us, we are positioned to receive their eccentricities as a gift rather than an annoyance. We will also avoid the trap of allowing small, inconsequential traits to effect our relationship.

2. Recognize that you yourself have traits that could be annoying. Yes, it’s true. Those who are close to you in your life either point them out to you regularly or daily love you in spite of them.

God’s call on our marriages does not fade or change as anniversaries turn from silver to gold. We are to reflect the loving relationship between Christ and His church. So, fight the tendency to see your marriage as a series of sprints. That type of endurance will fade into annoyance.

Marriage is a glorious marathon. Yet, it is better than a marathon because you don’t run it alone. You get to run it together with your spouse. Run in such a way that you cross the finish line together…and glad to be that way.

Four Women…One Changed Life

One of the more unique things about my life experience is that I have had the opportunity to live with four different families over the years. This has afforded me the wonderful opportunity to view four different women “up close and personal” and I have learned valuable lessons from each one…

Of course the first woman is my own mother. I am grateful for the many ways my own mom has been an example to me, but one of the things I love the most about my mom is her ability to laugh at herself…she probably does this better than anyone I know. I have so many great memories of all of us being in stitches and laughing together, all because my mom didn’t take herself too seriously and had learned to laugh at herself. When my own quirks come out or I do something embarrassing I want this same ability to enjoy the moment and simply laugh at myself.

The Haughery’s were the second family I lived with, during my last year and a half of college. I think I could fill a book with what I learned from Cynthia during that time. Simply put, she is one of my heroes! But if I had to pick just one way I want to be like her, it would be her unwavering, bedrock faith in God. I have watched Cynthia walk through the deep waters of suffering and I have never heard a complaint, only a resolve to trust God. When trials come my way in life, I want to walk through them with a “Cynthia-like” faith in God and his goodness.

Family number three is actually a family from here at Covenant Fellowship. During that last year of college I did some hospital rotations in this area for a few weeks and Jeff and Martha Clark were kind enough to let me (a complete stranger at the time) stay with them. What I saw in Martha during that short time was a woman who thoroughly enjoyed her children and her role as a wife and mother. To be around Martha was to experience her joy!

The last family I lived with was during the year that Jared attended the Pastor’s College down in Gaithersburg, Maryland. Somehow we ended up getting to live with the best host family ever…the Linn’s. What amazed me about Marianne was that we were the fifth family to live with them (and they have had two more since then!). Talk about learning to be flexible and embrace change! Every year Marianne had an entirely new family (with all their quirks and habits) to get used to and yet she did it so graciously…in a short time she made her home feel like our home. I want to be like Marianne in the way I embrace hospitality – and change.

I thank God for each of these four women. I love that I have had the chance to glean from each one during different seasons of my life…their impact has been bigger than they realize.

Perhaps God may give you the chance to host a family or single lady your home in the future. I promise there is eternal impact as you demonstrate what it means to be a godly woman, wife, mother, sister and friend to a woman welcomed into your home.

Wisdom on Unfamiliar Paths

In my ministry responsibilities I have the opportunity to read books that are meant to minister to folks who struggle with things that aren’t that familiar to me. Yet I often find great insights for myself in these books. One example is Ed Welch’s book, Addictions – A Banquet in the Grave. I found this book, which is targeted to people with life defining substance abuse problems, spoke in significant ways to my own ‘small a’ addiction tendencies. Here are a few quotes that continue to resonate with me and challenge my daily wants and how strong they hold on to me.

A couple of insights on the fear of the Lord:

“The basic idea behind the fear of the Lord, however, is much broader than our modern understanding of fear. While the holiness of God will leave many knees knocking when Jesus comes again, a mature fear of the Lord is more akin to awe, devotion, and worship. It is a response that says, ‘Your glory is irresistible.’ ‘In your presence, nothing else matters. You are all that I desire.’ Furthermore, it is a response that is active. It does something. It is not simply a passive devotion; it follows Christ in obedience. It searches out his will and can’t wait to do it.” Page 162

“With these great blessings in mind, it is obvious that the fear of the Lord should not be thought of as a response to a tyrannical ruler. Instead, it is our response to a loving and generous father who wants to give his children the best of gifts. In biblical times, the father had two fundamental concerns. One was that his children learn to honor and respect him, upholding the family name. The other was that the children be blessed so that the family line could continue for generations to come. The fear of the Lord is best understood in this context. It is the way we honor our Heavenly Father, and the means through which our Father blesses us.” Page 164

On the temptation to find joy in things that God does not allow:

“One of the deepest deceptions is the lie that there is something good out there and it is better than what God gives.” Page 192

On the sincerity of our desire for help (when we would be happy to confess to God, but find ways to avoid confessing to others)

“If we easily confess to God something that shames us to confess to a friend, we are thinking too highly of the opinions of people and not highly enough about the holiness of God.” Page 198

And finally, on one of the marks of godliness:

“The wise and godly person loves to have God tell him what to do.” Page 278