The Father on the Day Before the Wedding

My daughter Emily is getting married tomorrow. I’ve never done anything like this before, so I have no idea of what a Bride’s dad is supposed to feel. Come to think of it, even asking the question, ‘what am I supposed to feel?’, seems like a totally guy way of looking at things. But I’m feeling a lot of things, so as a public service to dads out there who might one day find themselves waking up the day before their daughter’s wedding, here is a rundown of the emotional state of a Father of the Bride.

· “I couldn’t be happier” feelings. These are my most common feelings. I couldn’t be happier that my daughter has found the man God has for her, and that we have a chance to celebrate their wedding on Saturday.

· “I’m getting old” feelings. These are sneaky. I can feel tears come to my eyes and memories flood my mind and it seems really nostalgic…then all of a sudden I realize these feelings are not about my daughter and her day, or anyone else. They’re about me getting old. Yuck. Gotta keep those feelings on a leash.

· “This is overwhelming” feelings. How did I get here? My little girl, who play-acted weddings since she could toddle around is now doing it for real. Is she ready? A room in my home that has always been filled with her presence will now be filled with something else. Am I ready?

· “I hope all these plans actually work” feelings. This feels a lot like panic. If you ever saw the original “Father of the Bride” with Spencer Tracy, these are dream sequence feelings. It’s amazing how easy it is to make a list of things that could go wrong. Suppose, for example I forget the “her mother and I do” line. Or my car explodes on the way to the wedding. Or….

· “I don’t have time for feelings” feelings. I’ve got a job to do. I’ve got a significant part to play. I’ve got a budget and details, and relatives coming in. I’ve got to focus. I’ve got women all around me – a wife and other daughters – I’ve got to manage their feelings. “I don’t have time for feelings” feelings seem to be a paradox, but I’ve got them. At least it feels like I’ve got them.

· “God is so good” feelings. These are the ones I can count on. These feelings squeeze out from my emotional chaos when I hem it in by truth. God has shown his goodness to me. He has redeemed my daughter, he has redeemed her chosen husband. The thing that really matters most to them about tomorrow is His glory. When I think of this undeserved grace on their lives, it traces quickly to undeserved grace in my life. I deserved wrath, I get blessing. It feels wrong. But the Gospel says otherwise.

There’s my feelings update. My daughter is getting married tomorrow. I can feel it.